Holding

Having checked in with Mom on a daily basis over the past week, it's clear that she's not improving very much. Her food intake was down to about 10% as of last weekend, and in the past few days that amount has decreased to practically nothing. She appears to be unable to swallow (food, water or medication), so she's losing weight and her left side seems to be seizing periodically, either due to restlessness or lack of anti-seizure meds. Fortunately, her morphine drop is still going so she's not in any residual pain from her operation or anything else.

Neither the hospital nor the hospice staff are sure, but it appears that Mom may have had another stroke during surgery on her arm, so there has been almost no movement on her right side. Her ability to communicate is severely diminished, and during our visits she fades in and out of consciousness, only able to say a few words. The rest of what she is able to say is unintelligible, but the look in her eyes and her facial expressions during those brief lucid moments show that she is connected, if only for a few minutes at a time. Our visits thus have been mostly composed of holding her hand, talking to her, telling her about our adventures, telling her how much we love her.

For anyone considering a visit (and you're welcome to do so), please be aware that the sight of her in this condition is a bit of shock, so be prepared.